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Give, but don't let it empty you.

Give, But Don't Let It Empty You.

January 18, 20242 min read

“Give, but don't let it empty you.” - Tony & Sage/ @AlchemicHealing


My husband Tony and I have always identified ourselves as givers. It's a trait that drew us together and one that we deeply value in our relationship. We love the joy that comes from giving - be it time, effort, or emotional support. However, our journey as habitual givers has not been without its challenges. We've learned, sometimes the hard way, that giving too much can take a toll on us, mentally and physically.

Give, but don't let it empty you.

Our Realization

The realization hit us gradually. We found ourselves constantly tired, feeling stretched too thin, and at times, even a bit resentful. We were so focused on the needs of others that we began neglecting our own. It was a wake-up call. As much as we loved to give, we had to find a way to do so without draining ourselves.

The Art of Balanced Giving

Our journey towards balanced giving began with introspection and honest conversations. We had to acknowledge our limits and learn to recognize the signs of overextending ourselves.

1. Understanding Our Limits: We started by defining our boundaries. How much could we give without feeling depleted? This required a deep understanding of our emotional and physical limits.

2. The Power of Saying No: Learning to say no was pivotal. We realized that saying no didn't make us selfish; it made us more responsible givers. It allowed us to give where it mattered most, without feeling overwhelmed.

3. Prioritizing Self-Care: We established self-care routines. Whether it was quiet time for reading, walks in nature, or simply unwinding together, these moments helped us recharge and maintain our capacity to give.

The Give and Take of Our Relationship

In our relationship, we strive to maintain a balance of giving and receiving. We ensure that our generosity is a source of joy, not exhaustion. We support each other in our giving endeavors but also remind each other to take a step back when needed.

Mindful giving has brought a new depth to our lives. We give more meaningfully now, and this has enriched not just those we give to, but also ourselves. Our acts of generosity are now sources of fulfillment, not fatigue.


Our journey as givers has taught us a valuable lesson: giving should be a source of happiness, not a cause of depletion. By recognizing our limits, embracing the power of saying no, and prioritizing self-care, we have found a sustainable way to continue giving without emptying ourselves. It's a delicate balance, but one that is essential for a fulfilling life of generosity.

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Tony & Sage Edwards

Tony and Sage Edwards are the duo behind the Alchemic Healing blog. They're all about growth, self-care, and the ins and outs of relationships. Just like you, they're on a journey of discovery and learning, and they're here to share what they know, offering a helping hand as you find your way too.

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